elphabaforpresidentofgallifrey:
hello 911 yes i’d like to report a murder
this bitch killed my vibe
(via lubricates)
its hard being boring and ugly at the same time
(via twistedtorture)
“i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography
“I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
“I want to wear shorts but I don’t tan and I’d rather not blind you” The trilogy
“I want to wear shorts but my huge dick always sticks out” a pop-up book
(via twistedtorture)
